TERRIBLE TWOS

From the tantrum at bed time to the screaming match in the shopping centre, it sometimes seems your child is constantly trying your patients. How could your cute little bundle of joy turn into a red faced shrieking brat? Some people are convinced that an overdose of sugar can lead to a hyperactive child. A balanced diet may help even out those highs and lows in a child’s energy levels and temperament. But then, how tied is your child? If your child has kept you up half the night you are usually a little tired and grumpy the next day. So why should you expect your child to be any different? When your child lifts their feet and flies down the driveway on their trice, we swear they are fearless. But in reality new things can be very scary for a young child. They don’t know what to expect and don’t have the knowledge to explain those common place noises, tastes and experiences. A flushing toilet can be frightening to a toddler who has experienced it up close for the first time. The next time you try to encourage them to the toilet they may simply tell you they don’t need to go or put on a full blown tantrum. While new experiences can not be avoided one train of thought says that routine will help keep your child’s behavior. A routine ‘teeth, toilet and to bed’ can take the strain out of bedtimes as your child knows the established boundaries. They tested it the first few times but now know what is expected of them. “I CAN’T do it!” is the cry of a frustrated toddler. They slam down the crayon and the tears start. You ask what the matter is and all you get is another “I CAN’T do it”. As they grow they are learning but sometimes their body or speech can’t keep up with their knowledge. They don’t have the words to explain what the matter is or they know they want to draw Spiderman but they don’t have the motor skills to draw it the way they see it in their minds. Distraction can be an easy solution but you need to help them deal with their frustrations without going into a fit of temper. And finally, is your child bored? You’ve heard the saying about idle hands… Some rules for taming your toddler: Be consistent – set the ground rules and stick to them. Set routines for everyday activities – meals, bath and bed times. Keep explanations and negotiations to a minimum – don’t be ruled by your toddler. Teach your children to play fair and share their toys. The best way is to ensure they spend time with other children. Try to find the source of the behavior and deal with it – if the child is tired send them for a nap or quiet time. Monitor their behavior and deal with it before it gets out of control. Try withdrawing your attention for a short period – most children want their parent’s approval… and with no audience what’s the point anyway?! When all else fails many parents use timeout– it not only allows your child to cool down but it also gives you a chance to regain your ‘happy place’. If your days start to feel like a series of battles it might be time to take a piece of advice from the experts – pick your battles. Winning the first three battles of the day can make the rest of the day go much smoother. Between two and five percent of children suffer from ADHD, but it is hard to diagnose in preschoolers. If you feel your child out of control and may be suffering from ADHD get assistance from a child psychologist or a specialist parenting programmed. But, most importantly, talk to other parents. You will probably discover your little monster is actually a typical toddler.